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Friday, 25 July 2014

W.A.L.T create our success criteria.



My Success Criteria.
Yes/no
  • Begin with an intro,w,w,w,w
Yes
  • Hook my reader
Yes
  • Linking words/phrases
Yes
  • Use good punctuation
Yes
  • Finish with a reflection
Yes
  • figurative language
Yes

                     
The Flood.

As soon as me and my sisters hopped into the car we felt awesome.Nan told us that we were going through a flood.After a few minutes I thought it was going to be scary.


After that, I waited for a while I was waiting for something amazing to come to my head so that I wouldn't get scared.Then pop! Out came an awesome idea,to think of something fun that i’ve did with my friends.”Are we nearly there?”I asked happily.”Nearly”nan replied.


After a few minutes we were getting to  the Taheke briged. As we turned the corner,all along the road was a big  flood.I started to wind the window down and look at the flood I saw dead cows and cars that couldn't get through”Ooo this is scary”I thought to myself.


The flood  was so strong that it made lots of cars get stuck. The current was a strong broom,sweeping everything in its path aside.


As we continued driving through the floods I was excited. I was so excited because  nearly all the floods that I went through where rough and scary but this one wasn't.


Then all of a sudden it happened, as we were driving through the flood the current started to get stronger and stronger.So we went in with a big truck.But the most scariest thing was that one car got stuck and some cars couldn't get through.


I started to get nervous and not excited a shiver crept up my spine.After a while it was our turn to drive through.My heart started to beat,second after second,it felt like a hammer banging against  my chest.But luckily and safefuly we made it through and went for the night at nan house.

That was the scariest flood I had ever been through. I will never forget that scary and uncool ride through the flood.

1 comment:

  1. Well done Gerry you really hooked me to read your recount of going through a flood. You need to re read your writing there are a couple of spelling mistakes. Keep using hooks to keep the reader interested in your writing.

    ReplyDelete